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Coping with change

by Selina Kelley

When things change, there is normally a guarantee that someone is upset about it. It's absolutely unavoidable. If people who created things within this game decided to concede to the wishes of everyone, quite simply, nothing would ever be made.

So, with that said, here are some ideas on how to react to situations where something has changed that you disagree with, don't like, have further ideas for, etcetera.

1) Approach the person directly.

Change

A coin. Isn't it pretty.

Most wizards are more than willing to converse with someone who has an idea, or a criticism over a particular code change. When you post on news or public forums, it can very easily lead to misunderstandings. If, after speaking with the person who made the change directly, you still feel the need to voice your opinion, you can post. Posting before fully understanding the reason for a change can sometimes ensure your view isn't really "heard"-- you've lost credibility if you don't know the facts before you post.

This goes the same for public channels (such as a gossip channel, or newbie channel). Arguing over channels rarely gets the right information to the right person, and is seem as inflammatory rather than constructive.

2) Take a deep breath.
Most of the time, the people who are the most upset are the ones that are directly affected. Yes, understandably, when something is modified to be downgraded, it can change your entire playing style. However, the worst way to approach this kind of situation is to immediately go on the offensive about the changes (see #1). The best way to be heard is to keep calm, don't attack, and be reasonable.

3) You are what you eat.
You're also who you associate with. If you are in the midst of a discussion regarding a change, addition or removal, it may not be the most sensible thing to invite people into the conversation that may be rash, or may not know enough details to provide a coherent and/or helpful point of view. Once again, it falls back on credibility. See #1.

4) Threats don't work.
A mud is more than one person. Rarely will threatening to leave invoke any kind of positive change, or convince anyone to revoke the changes. Quite honestly, rarely will the person involved care if you leave (especially if this is your first and immediate reaction). The worst way to approach any kind of discussion about changes is to immediately threaten anyone about anything-- you shut down all points of communication by doing this. See #2.

I hope these help. The above points are ones that I take into account whenever I have a disagreement with someone, especially on an online medium where words are so very easily misinterpreted.

Thanks for your time.


Selina Kelley can most often by found on ProphecyMUD. She is also an editor here at Imaginary Realities.